Not a day goes by where some sad individual doesn’t mistake me for Samus Aran, and lately I just can’t take it anymore. So it’s time to set the record straight once and for all. My name is Sarah Bryant.
There’s really no excuse for getting my name wrong. I’ve been fighting professionally for well over 20 years at this point. You’ve all had more than enough time to figure this out.
So here’s a news flash for you: not every blonde woman with a blue suit is Samus. If you think about it for just two seconds, we’re not even that similar. I don’t have a paralyzer gun, or a plasma whip, or jet boots. I’m not an intergalactic bounty hunter. I’ve never even been to space.
When I show up to a fight do I arrive in a futuristic spaceship? No, because I drive a Honda Civic. Am I known to fight opponents like Wolf or Akira in the World Fighting Tournament, or do you see me battling space aliens on the planet Zebes? This really isn’t that difficult.
And how embarrassing are you if you know the difference and still call me Samus? You think I haven’t heard that four billion times already? And you’re gonna act like I’m the unoriginal one?
It’s bad enough that I’ve always got to be on the lookout for the Judgment 6 organization, but on top of that I’m dealing this disrespect every single day. So just stop. Stop fucking calling me Samus.
Oh, and while we’re at it stop calling me Nina Williams too.