Venue Implements Wristband System Because of You-Know-Who

Tucson, AZ – Last week local venue Southwest Gaming Lounge implemented a new wristband system for its weekly fighting game event. Upon paying the required $5 venue fee, guests will now receive a wristband to show that they have paid.

“We’re taking steps to make the tournaments here feel a little more official,” said venue owner Paul Stevenson. “But mostly the changes are to ensure you-know-who pays the fee.”

“We tried using the honor system up to this point,” Stevenson continued, “But trusting you-know-who to pay the measly $5 venue fee without us having to carefully watch if he paid was getting tiresome. Of course every time we had to ask him to pay the venue fee he was ‘just about to’ or happened to ‘forget again’ for the fifth week in a row. Not anymore.”

The changes have been well received with some minor complaints. “It’s a little annoying that we have to wear wristbands because of one individual that we’re all aware of,” said local player Kevin E. “They always put the wristband on too tight or get half of the sticky part on your skin, and it’s all because of you-know-who.”

We also reached out to you-know-who for his thoughts on the new system.

“I’m guessing someone must have been trying to dodge the venue fee,” said the unnamed person, who virtually everyone knows has been trying to dodge the venue fee. “That’s messed up how someone in our own community would do that,” he continued. “Some people have no shame.”